When you first start to consider moving to a CCRC and start talking to friends and family about it, you will get lots of “helpful” and “insightful” advice and comments.
Advice and responses to this advice
“You are too young and healthy. Why would you want to live with a bunch of old people?”
New CCRCs are like resorts, it’s just that they cater to older people and their wants and needs. Resident ages start at 62 and average about 80. You hang out with your age group and do all the things you used to do and learn to do new things.
“Why not just move to a 55+ or active adult community?”
Many people living in 55+ communities are more toward the plus side and are not regularly active. Also, at some age you will need to move somewhere that offers a higher level of care, usually, after you already need the care and are unable to find a facility with an opening and, if you do find one, it may not be the one you prefer and you may not be about to move there without help.
“It costs so much to live there, there are much better things to do with your money.”
What I do with MY money is MY business. If I want to give it all to charity, then I will. If I want to spend it all on me so that when I die there is just enough left to bury me, then I will.
“How can YOU afford to live there?”
Because I made the right choices in life. Instead of living in debt and trying to impress others, I enjoyed life while I saved and invested for the future.
“You give up all your freedom.”
You are not a prisoner. If you are able, you drive, buy groceries, cook, travel, play golf, visit friends and family, and do all the things you have always done. As you reach the point you are unable to do certain things, those things will be done for you. You won’t need to interfere with the lives of family and friends by expecting them to do it for you.
“You lose all your privacy. Everywhere you go there are people.”
You should visit a CCRC. Just as it is in any community, you may be gregarious and interact with people every day or you can live the life of a hermit. It’s your choice. If you visit a CCRC at various times during the day, you will find that, unless people are going to or coming from a meal, class, or event, you may not see a resident. It's just like it is in your neighborhood now, people stay mostly inside their homes.
“Everyone there is just waiting to die.”
Aren’t we all! They are not just waiting to die, they are maintaining a high quality of life while realizing that they, just like everyone else, will at some point begin to fade and eventually die. They just are preparing for the eventuality and are taking responsibility for their own lives and not intruding on the lives of loved ones. They are choosing to enjoy life and go out with dignity. Many CCRC residents still work their normal jobs, they just live at CCRCs for all they offer.
“That’s why I have children; they will take care of me when it is needed.
What a great reason to have children. Do they share your sentiments? Will they share your sentiments when they can't live their lives as they planned because mon or dad needs constant care?
“You are leaving all your friends and neighbors.”
If I am just moving across town, I can easily stay in touch with my friends. If I am moving to another city or state, I will stay in touch with my friends and, if they are my friends, they will stay in touch with me. Today’s technology allows face to face communication anytime, anywhere. This move is to improve my life, not yours; I make new friends wherever I am.
“You will be eating institutional food every day.”
Have you ever visited a CCRC? At a CCRC, you can cook every meal at home, go out to eat anywhere you want to, or eat as many meals as you want at the CCRC restaurants. CCRCs have one or more elegant dining restaurants with top quality chefs and wait staff that serve high-quality delicious meals catered to your dietary needs. They have bistros and buffets for more casual meals, coffee shops, private dining rooms, and take out or delivered meals. CCRCs are relatively expensive to live in; one reason for this is the quality of the food and service.
“You have to get rid of most of your stuff.”
If you have ever moved, you know that one of the first things you do is get rid of all the stuff you have accumulated that you never need or use. Also, when you move to a CCRC you will no longer need yard and home maintenance equipment, woodworking tools (they have woodworking shops for residents), or fitness equipment (they have the latest fitness equipment).
Depending on the size of your CCRC housing unit, you may have to downsize the amount of furniture you have. If your life revolves around how much stuff you have, then a CCRC may not be for you. If you are a hoarder or an avid collector, a CCRC may not be for you. I talked to a couple in a CCRC who sold a huge riverfront log home and most of its contents, sold an extensive antique car collection and the garages used to restore them, and moved into a large three-bedroom apartment in a CCRC. They said they have not regretted it and are having some of the greatest times of their lives.
“You are spending your children’s inheritance.”
If you did your job as a parent, you raised your children to be adults and live their own lives. You need to live your own life. When you live in a CCRC, your children may live their own lives and not worry about you. If any money is left after you are gone, then they will get if you so choose. Most CCRCs have a contract plan that has a 90% refund of the entrance fee when you leave or die. When you die, the refund will go to your estate.
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